


All they had

by Caskettmyheart



Series: All they are [3]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/F, I'm sorry but seriously ANGST, Unrequited Love, background sanvers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-24 08:16:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20702810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caskettmyheart/pseuds/Caskettmyheart
Summary: “I can’t, Alex. Don’t ask this of me, I can’t go.”“Lena, please, she doesn’t understand.” Alex sounds desperate through the phone.“I know. I know she doesn’t. But I can’t put myself through this. I have been nothing but supportive but right now I have to put myself first.”AKASomewhere in this big city, the woman Lena loves is in a big white dress. Getting ready to be married to someone else that very next day. And it breaks her heart.





	1. Chapter 1

The caller ID shows it’s Alex. And she’s aware of what the woman is going to ask her even before she answers the phone. So she doesn’t greet her. No pleasantries. This is going to be far from pleasant anyways. Instead, she goes straight to the point.

“I can’t, Alex. I can’t go, don’t ask this of me. I can’t.” Lena rests her head against her hand, rubbing her forehead and closing her eyes. She sits defeated at her desk. There are dark circles underneath her eyes and stacks of papers everywhere, not as organized as they usually are.

Alex sighs in response, “Lena, please. She doesn’t understand.” Alex sounds desperate. And though Lena understands the position Alex is in, and why she’s desperate, she has to stand her ground.

“I know, okay? I’m aware she doesn’t. But I can’t put myself through this. I’ve managed so far. But not this. I’ve been nothing but supportive but right now I have to put myself first.” The only reason she manages to saw the words so surely, so fluently without her voice breaking – even though she can feel that familiar closing of her throat that comes with tears – is because she’s practiced this conversation time and time again. From the moment she opened the letter. In the car. In the shower. In her bed when the thought of this day approaching kept her awake at night. But it was usually not Alex on the receiving end. In her preparations she had been braver. “I’m not asking you to tell her anything, Alex. She’s better off not knowing at this point.”

There’s a pause before Alex speaks. “Do you really think so, Lena? If she knew maybe you could move past this. Go back to being friends like before. She misses that. She misses her friend. She misses _you_.”

Lena swallows the lump in her throat. She feels the words weighing on her heart. “I miss her too,” she almost whispers, “But it’s not the same.”

This, she knows, Alex understands. Alex does give her confirmation that she does with a sigh. “I know it’s not.”

Lena swivels her chair around and gets up to stare out the big office windows.

Somewhere in this big city, the woman she loves is in a big white dress. Getting ready to be married to someone else that very next day. The thought of it breaks her heart. She wanted to be happy for her. After all, Kara’s happiness is her happiness. But she couldn’t take it anymore. Not with him.

“I wasn’t going to tell you this, Alex.” Lena’s voice is distant, even to her own ears. She’s staring, eyes unfocussed. “I wanted to spare you for the knowledge so you wouldn’t have to lie to her and say you didn’t know.”

“Lena,” Alex’s voice came through worryingly, “Lena, what weren’t you going to tell me?”

“I’m leaving. The city. Possibly the country.” Her voice was flat, like this was a business thing. Well, after all that was her cover for the move. It was just easier this way, if it was a business thing too, so she made it into one.

The silence that follows is deafening. Even though it’s over within a heartbeat, it drags on. It feels like she sees the whole future flash ahead of her. Her walking into the plane, staring at the clouds below her in the sky and settling in a new office, in a new country, far away from everyone. Everyone she grew to see as family. All by herself, as it was before Kara walked into her life.

When Alex’ voice came through the speaker again, it sounded dangerously calm. “I’m guessing you’re not planning on saying goodbye before you go.” She doesn’t specify, but Lena knows she means to Kara. There isn’t an accusatory hint in there, it’s a mix of understanding and anger that seeps through, as only a protective sister would. She did once tell her, years ago when Alex only had her suspicions, that she wouldn’t hesitate to hurt Lena if she hurt her sister. It’s fair, Lena understands.

So she answers truthfully. “I don’t think I would make it far if I did.”

There’s a bit of rustling on the other side of the phone. “I understand,” Alex says, and Lena really feels like she does. “Should I tell Kara you can’t make it or not? I don’t know if she’d rather know or just not see you in the crowd. I don’t honestly know what’s worse. Maybe she’ll realise it at the rehearsal dinner tonight.”

“I can’t ask that of you. I can’t ask you to do that. I also don’t know what’s better, or worse.” She rubs her forehead again and breaks her stare into the city. Her voice is not as distant anymore, as if she realizes this is going to have consequences in the next hour or so, and not just in some future. “I do owe her a response for my absence as of late. So I’ll give her that much. Through a text or a letter if I have to. It’ll have to do. I just- I can’t speak to her.”

“Okay… It’s okay. I really do understand Lena. I’ll be here for her. And if you want we can keep in touch on the down low. It’s your choice. I know even if you delete everything, you still have ways to contact me.”

A knock on her office door pulls her out of the conversation.

“Listen, Alex. I have to go. I will keep in touch to let you know what’s going on, that I’m safe. You are family after all.” It hurts. It hurts so much leaving all her friends behind. But she doesn’t think she’d survive staying. She says a quick goodbye and hangs up, striding over to her office door, picking up her suitcase on the way out.

\--

Lena knew a text would get there too soon, and would possibly ruin the dinner and her big day tomorrow. And she didn’t want that for Kara. She wanted Kara to be happy, yes, really. It just hurt too much that it had to be with him. She a text was really out of the question. It would make Kara’s special day all about her and she might be selfish in her decision to run, but she wasn’t that selfish.

No, a letter it would have to be. It was more personal either way. So she asked her driver to please drive gently, and grabbed a pen and her personal paper. Damn her if she didn’t want to put in her best effort just one more time.

Once she put ink to paper, the words flowed out. It started off really casual, mentioning that she was sorry she hadn’t been there for many of the preparations. In truth she’d only been there for two.

Funnily enough, she’d been the first call when Kara’s fiancé failed to show up for a cake tasting appointment. It was months before the wedding, and it felt safe. And even though she’d eaten lunch and dinners with Kara before, along with many deserts. She wasn’t quite ready for the soft approving moans Kara let out when putting a new flavor of cake into her mouth. She’d managed to hold it together but she knew she’d have to put some distance in between them. It just wasn’t appropriate. And she’d have to adjust. So she started cancelling more plans, and making less of them in the following weeks. They’d keep their weekly lunch, that had been a ritual so long it was hard to say no to except in emergencies. But she skipped a few game nights. Cancelled extra plans like a ladies night going to a club, or even sometimes events she knew Kara would be for work. She used the excuse of working late, sometimes actually working, and more often than not just keeping busy. She started seeing Kara less and less. It hurt. But nothing hurt more than realizing Kara didn’t seem to notice her pulling away. There had only been one mentioning of Kara missing her at events and that was once at game night when the group had drunkenly called her and collectively said they missed her. That was also when realization had struck that Kara hadn’t really missed her much.

Meanwhile her heart hadn’t stopped aching since she opened that white envelope.

Realistically she knew it was because Kara was just so busy organizing, and her work was picking up more and more. She was being asked to do more investigative articles. That didn’t take away the pain though.

So she declined to participate in some other wedding preparations. The only thing she couldn’t refuse was the bachelorette’s party, consequently being the second wedding prep event she did actually attend. Kara had expressed her wishes for it to be a spontaneous Girls’ night out, not planned ahead of time, maybe a day or so, to make sure everyone was available. It was just going to be Kara, Alex and Maggie, along with Sam and her. And if they could manage, Lucy. And it was only about two weeks before the wedding that they actually all managed to align their plans and go crazy for a night.

Lena hadn’t planned on actually drinking much. She was painfully aware of how drunk her could fuck everything up. God knows she almost did it before. Drunk her was way too honest. And honesty and hidden feelings was not a good combo. Luckily Alex and Maggie were there to alternate and help her overcome the sad drunk moods. And dance through the happy drunk moods. Even through her flirty drunk moods, she managed to not spill her heart’s desire to Kara. If only thanks to a very observant Lucy, who stepped in to dance with her and pull her to the bathroom when a tear escaped her eye and the three shots she took back to back didn’t stop them from coming. A shoulder to cry on was never needed more.

She’d apologized to the other ladies the next day, with a pounding head and bottle of water to accompany her. And even though they said they didn’t mind, she knew she’d just make it worse for them to juggle whatever Lena was to Kara so that was the point where she just cut contact except for a quick and dismissive response in the group chat and to Kara when she sporadically did send a text.

It was also that pounding headache and her round of apologies that made her realize this would only end up two ways. Either she’d ruin Kara’s day and future by confessing her love and straining their relationship. Or she’d just pull off the band-aid and get away from it all.

The next day she closed a deal for a bigger office building in London, and another in Dublin.

In the letter, she apologized for being so absent, but she wrote some excuse about them needing to move some of the big research areas to the UK and her needing to prepare for it. She did honestly express she missed her friend, and would miss her across the ocean. But she didn’t promise to stay in touch. For all she knew, this might be the last thing she ever said, even indirectly, to her best friend.

And then, in writing such heavy words, an idea popped into her head. Sure it’d be selfish, a terrible thought really. One she’d promised herself for days she wouldn’t do. But reflecting on the last few years, she knew she couldn’t leave it at this.

“Alerio, change of plans.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This (part of the) story was based on the ever beautiful song: Even if it's a lie. And yeah I listened to it a lot while writing and re-writing this chapter.   
Enjoy, and don't hold back your tears/screams/laughs/etc. 
> 
> \--

Lena stepped out of the car, letting her eyes roam over the decorated venue. She took a deep breath. The brisk evening air hit her lungs and made her shiver. It was already later than she would have liked. The dinner would be well on it’s way by now. But, she had wanted to put effort into her look, thus taking the extra time to make sure she picked the right dress, coat, and make up. If this was going to be the last time she would be in a room with these people, she better leave a lasting impression.

Really, only one impression of her mattered. She hoped that showing up one more time would mean enough for Kara to latch on to this memory of this day, when far in the future she’d maybe think of her again. Maybe. Who knows.

Even if she had not been present much for the wedding preparations, Lena had not taken no for an answer when offering to pay for a significant amount of the costs for this venue, among other things. It might not be her dream to see the woman she loved get married to someone else, that didn’t mean her best friend wasn’t going to be allowed to have everything she could ever wish for while prepping. Now, Lena felt even a little safe, knowing that even though she’d been a bad friend and was about to be probably the most hated person in the found-family for disappearing without a word, at least she’d helped financially. It wasn’t an excuse, but it helped ease her mind a bit.

There was a staff member outside, looking pretty bored until she showed up. He straightened up and helped her up the stairs – her dress might be gorgeous, practical was not an accurate description. He informed her the dinner was well underway, to which she apologized for being late. Still he made sure she felt welcome and comfortable.

“Would you like us to alert someone you’ve arrived or would you prefer a big entrance?” the man asked without any air to it. Maybe he was used to family crashing these kinds of events with a big entrance. 

Lena chuckled, “I might seem brave, but I’d rather not draw too much attention. Perhaps it’s best to not disturb the happy couple,” she tried to say it as neutral as possible, but still grimaced. It hurt even to say it. “Could you get Alex, sister of the bride to be, instead?”

“Right away, Miss Luthor.”

The man left her in the foyer of the building. She turned around herself, taking in the ornate decorations. Kara had chosen for a lavender and white theme, along with golden accents. It was elegant and perfectly suited for Kara.

A moment later, Alex came into view looking surprised but nevertheless happy to see her.

“When they said Miss Luthor had arrived, I thought it was an imposter perhaps, but here you are.”

“In the flesh,” Lena sighed and Alex took her friends’ hands in her. “I promised myself not to make this harder but well,” She gave Alex this look that signified a feeling the other woman had known all too well when it came to the love of your life. “I’m weak.”

Alex nodded in understanding, not trying to deny the feelings that Lena was expressing. Lena continued: “I honestly don’t know what’s more cruel; Weeks of barely any contact and just leaving without a word, or seeing each other one more time and perhaps getting to say goodbye properly.”

“Or,” Alex started, “to whom it’s more cruel. Her, or you.” Alex rubbed her thumbs over Lena’s knuckles, looking down at their hands and then taking her by the arm to lead her inside. “I said before that I understood, and honestly, I do.” Then she broke out in a little smile, “I’m just happy I get to see my friend again as well.” And with that Alex led them further into the building. “Well, you’ve picked a good time to come. The main course is about to be served but everyone’s up and about so I don’t think many will notice your arrival.”

Lena nodded and let herself be led along. Alex was right. As they walked in, sure enough people were mingling and not paying attention to her. Some people glanced over, about half she had never seen before. They must be from his side of the family. Others nodded or said a quick hello and didn’t seem fazed that she was late. Not unlike Maggie, who was probably well informed by Alex at this point. Maggie took her hands and squeezed as a sign of support before letting her walk on with Alex.

“When’s your flight?” Alex asked in a low voice, not looking at Lena but rather around the room.

“Oh, well technically about an hour ago.” Lena noticed Alex’ little glance towards her. “But I postponed it. They’re on standby for when I arrive.”

Alex nodded discreetly, “So probably right after this dinner?”

Lena swallowed, her hand in her coat pocket running fingers along the folded edges of the letter she’d written in the car. “Yeah. Probably.”

Alex left her at her assigned seat that had been left empty. The table was an oval shape so most people could see each other. It was a slightly bigger rehearsal dinner than was normal, she supposed, but with Kara choosing to have her found family here, with James and Winn, along with Sam and Lucy and of course Maggie as Alex’ plus one… The amount of people on his side of the family would have to balance out, that much she did know of his side of the family. Then again she didn’t mind too much. It meant a little more anonymity.

“We kept a spot open for you, next to Sam. Ruby stayed home this evening. Will you be okay here? Everyone will take a seat once I give the sign. If you want you could talk to Kara first?” Alex was being so incredibly considerate, when really, she should be with her sister. Speaking of, Lena glanced over to where Kara was in an animated conversation with her mother, fiancé and soon to be in-laws. It was the first time she’d seen Kara in person since the party and she looked absolutely stunning in her lavender dress. White would be tomorrow. She remembered the picture Kara had texted months ago from a fitting where most of the other ladies (and Winn) had been present. She’d been so happy to find a gorgeous dress – even if it hadn’t been white – she revolved the entire theme of the wedding around it. The smile that was on her face now was just as bright as it had been then in the picture. Lena’s heart bloomed for just a moment, before Kara turned her look onto her fiancé and Lena had to look away. She turned her attention back to Alex.

“It’s alright, Alex. You can tell them to bring the food out, I’ll talk to Kara after. Thank them for waiting for me, will you?”

Alex nodded and left her to sit next to Sam, who arrived at her chair and immediately swept her into conversation.

Once everyone was seated, the volume in the room began to dim, though conversations carried on. Lena was happy she wasn’t suffering in silence, although she didn’t dare do more than steal a glance at Kara every once in a while. She wasn’t even sure Kara had even seen her yet. Luckily Sam’s questions about the move – she would be taking over as CEO of this branch now, much like she had done previously with Metropolis – gave her more to focus on. The delicious food was an aid as well.

She was putting a bite of food in her mouth, nodding at something Sam was saying when she glanced over at Kara again, only to find two eyes staring back at her. Lena froze. Kara wasn’t smiling, wasn’t laughing. She wasn’t doing much of anything but looking at her. It made Lena feel wrong in all the strangest ways. All she wanted was for Kara to be her happy normal self, even if it pained her, but she could feel the energy was off. Shit. Why couldn’t she have just kept her own promise and left immediately? Kara’s eyes were _still_ on her. What was probably only a few seconds felt like an eternity. She gulped down her food and broke eye contact, reaching for her wine instead. A good red usually made her feel better.

A moment later, she couldn’t help but dare look back at Kara, the other woman was already turned back to her fiancé and nodding along to the conversation.

Fuck.

It wasn’t until after the dessert that people explored the venue again. Lena had talked to Sam and Lucy, even Alex again. She had asked Sam not to mention the big L-Corp move when she first mentioned it only a week or so ago, and so far she hadn’t. Lucy wasn’t aware but they didn’t get to see each other much so they had loads of other things to discuss. It felt nice, being around her family again. She’d missed them too. Sure she saw Sam almost every day at work, but that was different. Here, with them all together, even if there were many people she didn’t know, she got that sense of home again. Even with the uncomfortableness that was looming around the corner as her confrontation with Kara drew nearer.

After a while, Alex gave Lena a look as she went with Maggie to the balcony. Lena made sure to grab her mantel coat and followed them out the big glass door.

“Not that I approve of what you’re doing,” Maggie said, getting straight to the point with a hard look and her arms crossed, “I do understand.” Her face softened in a way only Maggie really could.

“Thank you,” was all Lena could really say. “I’m pretty sure I made a big mistake coming here though. While I was eating I looked over at Kara and I- I’d never seen her look at me like that. So hard. So… cold.”

Maggie’s eyebrows arched, “Wait, Kara? Cold?” Maggie let out a whistle, “Damn Lena.”

Lena was starting to talk with her hands flailing around. “Yeah, I’d never really imagined this as a possibility. I mean, anger, sure. Confusion maybe. Happiness? ‘Cause I mean it’s Kara we’re talking about.” Alex and Maggie chuckled at that in unison.

Maggie glanced over her shoulder. “I guess we’re about to find out what she really feels.”

Lena’s eyes went wide with panic, before taking a steadying slow breath.

“We’ll leave you to talk, alright?” Alex said, stepping forward and giving Lena a small but reassuring smile. Lena only nodded slightly and turned as the couple took each other by the hand and walked back inside. Lena followed them with her eyes until she couldn’t avoid it anymore and her gaze landed on Kara.

The two ladies stood there, in silence, just looking at each other, taking in how the other person looked. After a beat of silence, they both broke out in a small smile and walked closer to each other.

“Hi,” was all Lena could manage. She was trying to push everything down, mute her bubbling feelings of sadness, of happiness even, but also of regret and fear and love. It was hard though, and she just couldn’t help but want that little sense of normalcy again. Before Kara got engaged. Before she fell in love with her, even. (Though, really, it was almost love at first sight.)

“It’s been a while,” Kara said, a cloud in the air accentuating that she’d just spoken. “I’m glad you managed to make it.” This time she really did break out a big, typical Kara smile. “I missed you, you know?” It was all Lena had been wanting to hear for weeks. And she hadn’t been expecting it. Her heart soared. But she tried her best not to show it outwardly.

Lena sighed and looked at her feet. She couldn’t look at Kara and just lie. “I’m sorry, Kara. I was very busy and the timing is unfortunate. But I see everything’s turning out great!” She looked back up at Kara and gave her the biggest smile she could manage.

Kara didn’t seem to notice it was fake. “It’s going alright, yeah. I haven’t had too much stress, which I do have to thank you for. I know you made some things happen.” Kara walked over to her and leaned against the balcony railing. The shift in energy felt great. This felt like their casual conversations on the CatCo balcony again.

“It’s the least I could do. I knew I couldn’t be there much in person, so making it easier for you to organize only felt right.” Lena went to stand next to Kara and mirrored her pose. It felt good expressing the truth when she was hiding so much other stuff.

Kara regarded her for a moment. “I know there’s something else. Something else that’s been keeping you away or occupying your mind.” Of course Kara read her like an open book. She always did, except on some key moments when really, she was clueless as ever. “It can’t just be work. I can tell. But I also know it can’t be easy for you.”

Oh god did she know? Lena held her breath. Did she find out? Did she finally see what apparently every one else could see a mile away? (She was never living it down with Lucy, Maggie or Sam.) Did one of them tell her as a last ditch effort to let her down easy? Was this going to be it?

“I mean,” Kara continued and Lena could only regard her with fear, trying to remain calm, “I know that eventually you’ll tell me and just don’t wanna burden me with it now, obviously. Whatever it is.”

Lena suddenly felt like she could breathe again, only until the realization hit that she would never actually tell Kara, “Yeah… Yeah, obviously.” And she crossed her arms over her chest. The chill was starting to get to her. And not just from the outside air. She was going to run before telling Kara. “I really am sorry, for not being there more, Kara. And you’re right, everything will be clear soon. But first it’s your big day. And right now that’s all you should be focusing on.”

“Honestly, I’m glad it’s going to be over soon.” Kara sighed. “I mean don’t get me wrong, I loved organizing this. But I’ll also be glad when all of this is done and I can just go back to my routine life. Then maybe I won’t have to cancel our weekly lunch because of a last minute dress fitting.”

“It’s okay, Kara.” It felt wrong to have Kara feel bad about cancelling on her when she’d been the one doing it left and right and center.

“No, it’s really not. I always look forward to them and we only cancel them in emergencies but even then-“

“Kara, really. It’s okay.” Lena cut her off. She wouldn’t let Kara apologize. “Things are changing anyways.” Kara looked at her curiously and Lena continued trying to safe the situation. “I mean you’re getting married!” Lena tried to laugh it off. “I mean that’s a big change. I wouldn’t be surprised if you spent even more time together with- with him than you’ve been doing. It’s only normal to have to cancel a lunch for that.” She and Mon-El had never been close, but lately picturing his face just came with that smug smile, and saying his name hurt her.

Kara gave her a puzzled look. “Okay, yeah, sure, I might be getting married but that doesn’t mean I’m going to ditch my best friend. It’s our thing, we’ve been doing it since we knew each other, basically!” Kara furrowed her brow, as if she couldn’t imagine not spending time with her best friend and Lena couldn’t help but find it adorable. Even when the conversation was turning dangerously close to out of her control. “I mean, you’ll still be my number one!” Kara exclaimed in her typical Kara manner, with a radiant, bright smile. And for a moment, Lena’s heart burst open. This. This is why she risked coming here. She just had to hear Kara say it, _one more time_.

“Well,” Kara continued and Lena’s smile already faltered, “After Alex and Mon-El, but I don’t see it as a competition. You’re all my equal favorites.”

One more time… Even if it’s a lie.

Lena forced her smile again, looked at Kara briefly before looking down again and nodding. Defeat. “Yeah. Yeah I know that.” But her smile didn’t remain on her face long. And she could see the confusion rising in Kara’s eyes. But her heart, that had been so warm just a moment ago, hurt again. And she was afraid that her eyes were starting to water. She wouldn’t be able to handle any more questions. So she did the only thing she could think of and shifted the attention.

She went in for a hug, and a much needed one at that. She wrapped her arms around Kara’s back and pulled her close. “Thank you. For being a good friend.”

Kara, ever the hugger, had been caught of guard maybe a little, but she melted into the hug soon enough. Her arms circled Lena’s neck, her mouth resting right next to Lena’s ear so she whispered, “Of course.”

Lena had chills down her spine. It was now or never. She’d already gotten what she wanted, or what she knew to be the truth, rather. She really didn’t have anything more to lose. Acceptance. Her heart was loving a person who just didn’t love her back. And it hurt, but she was going to protect herself. She was going to run. So why not try one more time.

“I love you, Kara.” Lena whispered, and pressed her a little closer, resting her chin on Kara’s shoulder, blinking back a tear that was going to escape.

Kara chuckled and Lena could feel it in her entire body. Then she softly spoke into her ear, “I love you too, Lena.” _One more time_. The tear fell just as Kara was pulling back out of the hug.

“Oh no why are you crying?” Kara took Lena’s face in her hands and wiped the tear trail away with her thumb and gave Kara the gentlest of smiles.

Lena shrugged, trying to pass it off. “I’m just happy, that’s all.” Lena allowed the moment to happen, even when her heart was screaming and her mind was telling her this was such a bad idea.

“Yeah?” Kara tilted her head to make sure Lena was looking into her eyes.

“Yeah.” Lena nodded and took a steading breath. She regarded Kara fully, once more. Then she noticed Kara was only in her lavender dress. No coat. “Here,” she said as Kara shivered, “Take my coat.” Lena was already letting the coat fall off her exposed shoulders and moving it over Kara’s as she uttered words of protest. “Really, I insist. Can’t have the bride sick at the wedding, huh?” Reality struck her with each word she spoke.

Kara smiled. “I did actually leave my coat in the car when we came here. Thank you. But what about you? I mean you look stunning in that dress but aren’t you cold?”

Lena shook her head in response. “It’s all good, I have another one in my car. I’ll just have Alerio bring it when I leave.”

Although skeptical, the reporter seemed to take it as enough of an answer and accepted the nice mantel coat to snuggle into.

Not a second later, in the comfortable silence they enjoyed together, Kara’s fiancé showed up. Of course he had to. The look on his face betrayed he had been watching them, maybe even for longer that would be appropriate for a private conversation. He obviously hadn’t liked what he was seeing. That’s how it had always gone between them. He’d never liked her much. And maybe if she’d ever made a move on Kara, she could understand it. But she had been kind, tried to maintain a level of professionalism when it came to him and Kara. But apparently that hadn’t been enough. So a sense of competition and disgust it had been. Still she’d tried to remain civil.

Kara must have seen Lena look past her, and turned to see Mon-El standing there, now a smile on his face. In a matter of seconds, she was whisked away by him. And Kara of course, none the wiser about the looks between her best friend and fiancé, about how special this moment was for Lena… Kara let it happen. She had no reason not to. Kara threw one more look over her shoulder at Lena, smile on her face, before she was caught up in more conversations with different people on a different part of the balcony.

Lena turned away, blowing out a puff of air. The cold was starting to seep into her without her coat. She couldn’t watch her leave. But after a moment she did start looking through the windows into the room. Alex and Maggie were happily talking with Eliza. Sam and Lucy seemed to hit it off. Winn and James were seemingly playfully arguing about something with each other.

She decided it was best to leave it that way. Everyone else was happy, most of them none the wiser. She wouldn’t draw any attention this way. It was for the best.

With a quick word to one of the staff members, Alerio brought the car up front and she braved the cold air a little longer with her open dress. At least she was sure Kara had something to remember her by. Physically, and in writing, as she thought after the letter she tucked into her coat pocket.

She didn’t look back as the car pulled away.

“Where to, Miss Luthor?”

“To the airport, please Alerio.”

**Author's Note:**

> \---  
Ouchie?
> 
> I thought of making this just one chapter, but it's honestly been about a year since I've written anything for Supergirl. And about half a year since I've written anything at all. So I felt I could just publish this and the feedback would drive me to continue. (And no you won't have to wait half a year, hopefully. I have a very pushy #1 fan who will help me. Thanks Bossuyt)


End file.
